Is it okay to have enemies in axe throwing?

I try to be liked. People, generally speaking, are very sweet and kind to me while I’m building up the courage to do interviews or happily snapping away with my camera.

I’m just a round, little man who looks, by all accounts, like he’d be happy to live in a deep hole in some mountain and never interact with another living person again. You know what I mean. The guy in the story that a brave adventurer comes across who seems isolated but harmless. A weird little guy who is helpful but not necessarily important to the story.

But, even so, I am not without enemies. I am not free of those that can’t stand the sight of me (either maliciously or because my personality is something just so frustrating to them).

I’ve been thinking a lot about enemies in axe throwing. Whether people earn that title through their own junk-ass attitudes, or through the small cuts of personality/behavior, or by being unbeatable in the game itself.

We, as the community of the sport, believe in assumed friendship, I think. We’re all doing this goofy thing, we’re all spending too much to do it, and that creates a sort of deep shared experience that brings us together. But after years of weaseling myself into various cohorts, I’ve also come to realize the shared experience of having at least one person each thrower views as their enemy. An axemy, if you will (and I will).

But not all axemies are the exact same.

For instance: I don’t think I have anyone who considers me an axemy because I am simply unbeatable (I am extremely beatable. I’m basically an egg at Waffle House with how beatable I am). I certainly DO have people who consider me an axemy because I’m annoying/full of myself/have insulted them in one way or another.

On the flip side, I don’t “hate” anyone because I can’t beat them, yet. I can’t beat most people in a tourney setting, and the energy it would take for me to have that level of anger in my heart is far too high.

But I am a person. I exist in this world. I have people out there in the community who make me feel bad or uncomfortable, and that’s okay. It’s okay that I don’t love every single one of us all the time. But do I consider those people enemies axemies? I don’t know. I don’t think so?

Here’s where this ramble is going: There’s a big difference between having a rivalry and flat out hatred for another thrower. Rivalry is fine. It’s part of every competitive everything. But making an axemy and hating the person feels like some schoolyard nonsense to me. Point in fact, while I do have lots of people I care deeply about in axe throwing, the majority of those people have lives I know very little about. The idea of getting the big grumps about them, based soley on seeing them on league nights or a handful of times a year is wild to me.

I guess I’m writing this for two reasons. First: I had nothing to write about today. And second: after years, I’m starting to see weird ally/enemy distinctions being made, and it doesn’t make much sense to me. I get that we’re humans and as such have some deep-seated tribalism we can’t get past as a species, but we’re also thinking beings, and can do better.

Axe throwing, when it’s really humming along, is about a bunch of goobers doing something very niche and very fun with each other. Forming a playful rivalry with another thrower is a big part of that, maybe, but burning down another person you interact with just because of axe throwing isn’t the best. So maybe consider if it’s worth your energy or their joy.

Oh – and just to get ahead of it: this isn’t a vague-book kinda thing. If you think this post is about you, it’s time for some introspection. I literally have nothing else to write about at the moment and didn’t want to miss another Tuesday.