3 unhinged thoughts I had about saving/changing axe throwing.

There is a period of time, each night, where I’m somewhere between the waking and the dreaming world. This third space, this brief road before reaching the land of Nod, where my brain tries to connect the possible with the imaginary. And, for the most part, the thoughts my little thinker thinks during these times are lost among the sea of memory.

But I’ve managed to capture three of them, and lemme say: they are wild.

And as such, I need to make them everyone’s problem.

Change: Make an automatic return for axes. Like bowling.

Okay.

So listen: we could speed up the axe throwing process by creating a system where boards shake out your axe, it is dropped onto a conveyor belt, and it scuttles its way back to you. You’d need several more axes to account for the delay of time, but the Ford-assembly-line style of this process would allow for faster matches and less dilly-dallying between throws.

You may ask yourself: what about questionable scores? What about confirmation? What about the additional cost?

And I’ll answer: my sleepy brain didn’t consider that one bit, and I refuse to consider it now.

Save: One board for matches

Right now, we’ve got 3 boards. And each one holds a very important element of the game: Left Clutch (1), Bullseye (2), and Right Clutch (3). And that means there are three boards to change, 3 times the number of boards to buy.

There’s got to be an easier way!

And, according to my brain as it shuts down for the defrag period of sleeping, there is.

Instead of a big ol’ target that is, if we’re being honest, kinda taking up more space than its worth, how about we just go down to a single board. Just one.

Now instead of buring through all that wood, you’re able to extend your wood purchase, have faster board changes, and fit more lanes into a space than before. Yeah, it’s a big change, but I think it’d help with a lot of the cost issues venues are currently facing down.

Honestly? Out of all my absurd sleepy-time ideas, this one makes the most sense. That’s not saying a lot, but still.

Change: Auto-wet boards

I need to be clear: when I imagined this one, it was very close to a nightmare to see (with my brain eyes).

The idea is this: instead of walking up and watering the boards, like we are very misinformed gardeners, there’d simply be a button you press (or, I guess, a handle to pump, like an old-time water pump thing from the 1920s) that would wet the boards from behind the target.

It could be in front of the target, kind of like the sprayers at a grocery store veggie aisle, but even in my sleep-paralysis times that seemed risky.

The water would permeate the boards evenly, allowing for proper moisture levels all without the song and dance of walking up, feeling the boards, spraying, and walking back. Talk about totally sensible convenience!

So, anyway, this is what I think about when I’m all curled up in my badger hole. I’m sorry.