The First Drunken Smithy Marathon League

On this Saturday last, I had the chance to attend the very first Drunken Smithy Marathon League, and boy howdy, it was a good one. The environment, the actual operation of the thing, the competition — it was all just…I dunno…it made me excited about axe throwing in a way I kinda forgot about.

For one thing, Drunken Smithy/Drunken Smithy Mead Hall are, looks/feels wise, cool as hell. You’re surrounded by handmade swords/knives/maces/axes, there is a freaking forge space through glass that you can hear operating the entire time you’re throwing, the mead tastes like candy and there are plenty of places to chill out — not that we got much time to chill out, as the marathon league was a small one, overall.

Lebanon isn’t what I’d call a tourist destination. It feels like home because it’s so ding dang close to where I grew up, but it’s…you know…like most of Pennsylvania. But the space they’ve made at Drunken Smithy was something else. It felt custom-made for happy fun axe times.

Now, this was the very first marathon league the good folks of Drunken Smithy ever put on. At the helm (it’s a clever use of language, dear reader. Helm like a ship, but also helm like a helmet. Because of the forging? Do you see? An MFA in creative writing earns you that kind of dashing wordplay) of the whole thing was Nick, who frankly did an amazing job. There were no big gaps in play, no ultra-late-night throwing. Point in fact, we finished and left with the sun still in the sky, which is rare, in my experience, even with a smaller league number.

As a very new axe house (and due to its proximity to Artifice, my current home venue), the competition was mostly local throwers I knew. But there were a handful of Drunken Smithy throwers, and a Kevin Bradley, who helped tamp down any worries Nick had while running the marathon league, and was full of kindness/Dr. Pepper.

And it was quite a marathon, to be sure. For one thing, it was a true, 28-match showdown, which I and my body managed to limp through (being clear: I was a wreck at the end, what with my roly-poly body, but I made it through, so brave). I did…okay in the league itself, finishing out at 4th. I did better in the tourney, finishing 3rd and earning myself a little bottle-opener axe trophy!

As far as actual, screws-to-wood setup goes, the Drunken Smithy has it pretty much worked out. One long line of targets, stools for scorekeepers to sit on, lots of space in the mead hall to sit and chill. My only complaint was with the boards: they are very dry, and very hard from the offing. Nothing that a good spraying couldn’t resolve, but there were a few more dropped axes. Not a huge problem, but truth in journalism and all that.

I’d rank the venue this way, in my totally accurate, scientifically-proven rating system:

Cost: 5/5
(100 bucks a league)

Space: 6/5
(a freaking forge and mead hall)

Boards: 3/5
(v. dry, v hard, chewed up quick)

Service: 4/5
(attentive, kind, fun)

Amenities: 4/5
(a lil expensive, but food on site/drinks on site, and access to options nearby. Had to walk around a corner and hallway for the public mall toilet)

Operation: 5/5
(Not always dependent on the league runner, but this marathon was smooooooth)

I also had a huge internal victory of not buying a single sword. I resisted, dear reader, and I’m sure my reading audience can attest to what a victory that is for people like us. I doubt this will hold, but for now I’m proud of myself.

Overall, I had a really fun time, threw pretty alright, and made it to the podium with only a little bit of lasting, painful physical injury. For an axe house that’s within an hour of my home, it’s likely going to become a place I visit often. If you see another marathon opportunity pop up, or just wanna, you know, forge your own axe and then immediately throw it, I highly suggest visiting.

So that’s it for this write up! I snagged an interview with the league runner, Nick, which I’ll be posting later this week, but I wanted to get this lil’ wrap-up out first.

As is typical, I snapped a few photos of the day. Remember: if you see a picture you want, go ahead and snag it. If you see a picture you don’t want up, let me know and I’ll pull it, no questions asked.