a new way to throw axes: throwteams

Okay. Okay listen. Look and listen.

Sometimes I have thoughts just before falling asleep, and I scroll out these ideas on a little notepad and wake up to see what that thought was. Most times, these ideas are absolute nonsense. But sometimes — sometimes — they are pretty fun. In this case, I dreamt up a way to answer the age old (10 year) question: how do we make axe throwing a more team-centered sport.

Now, lemme premise with a few statements:

1. I don’t know how to design sports.
2. I know I am missing a lot of stuff that could make this actually work. Get off my back.
3. I’m not saying this is the future of axe throwing. It’s not. It’s just a fun idea that I came up with while slipping off into the land of nod.

So here’s how it’d work, kinda:

The Throwteam

The Throwteam would consist of 6 throwers.

These throwers are typically from the same home axe venue, but that’s not a requirement.

Furthermore, the Throwteam must be comprised of a spread of averages (A thrower with an under 50 average, two with 50-60, two with 60-70, one with 70+.

If your team can’t field that sort of spread (you have all 70+ average throwers OR all <60 average throwers), your team starts with a handicap/advantage for scoring in the competition, but more on that later.

So it’d look something like:

Stacy	72.2
Saucy William	65.1
Brillbert	68.8
Chreeestopher	55.5
Glumpers	51.1
Stacy’s Evil Twin, Stacy II	45.9

This team doesn’t get any advantage/disadvantage b/c they fit the requirement, but there would be SOME CALCULATION to balance it if every thrower had an average that was above 70, or some such.

The competition itself

Throwers on each Throwteam would compete individually against their like-averaged counterpart on another team. So in our example (sorry, axeample) above, Saucy William (with a 65.1 average) would throw against Bland Harold (who has an average of 64.8), and so on.

Each match would carry two measurements: Overall individual score, and result. The points you earn during each round breaks down into “team points:”

0-15 points: 1 team point
16-25 points: 2 team points
27 points: 3 team points

And if you win your match, you earn an additional 2 team points.

After each thrower competes, all of those points are added up to determine the top X teams (depending on number of teams, but in my imaginary world, there are 20 teams total (120 throwers, I think?), and the top 10 move on to day 2/the finals tourney.

So using our example above against another totally realistic team:

TEAM DELIGHTMARE	FINAL SCORES
Stacy	60
Saucy William	54
Brillbert	66
Chreeestopher	42
Glumpers	54
Stacy’s Evil Twin, Stacy II	56
Final Team Score	332

TEAM CHIPWICH	FINAL SCORES
Liz	62
Shiz	51
Wiz	62
Chris	56
Glizz	40
Frizz	66
Final Team Score	337

And remember: if a team is comprised of all 70+ average throwers, they get a penalty built into their score. I have no idea what score penalty that is, but I’m sure someone could figure it out.

Oh and lower-average teams get a boost to their score. but, again, I don’t know what that would actually be. Use your imagination.

(Maybe it’s like, a +10/-10 situation? per every thrower who’s above/below the average range by 5 points? I dunno. I don’t think that way. Either way:)

Everyone does the same thing again, and points determine who wins the whole thing.

In THEORY: a team could win even if its individual throwers don’t win their matches.

Why i like this idea

Axe throwing is an individual sport, and that’s fun. Like, I really like it, because the only person I let down is myself. BUT there is something to be said for the fun of being part of a group, and working towards a larger goal.

AAAND it promotes newer/still learning/still growing throwers getting involved in bigger axe throwing events and be meaningfully involved in a team’s success.

aaaaaaAAAAAAND you get to create team uniforms. Team tattoos, even, maybe?

I dunno. I just think it’d be a fun way to get people out to events, create a bit more drama, and maybe create more of a…hmm…more of a story around the sport? We could finally have coaches on the sidelanes shouting at throwers about keeping their elbows in and such?


Anyway, this is what I imagined while falling asleep a few days ago. Now you have to live with it, too.