The U.S. Championship: what I will and won't do.

The U.S. Championship is happening this weekend at ChillAxe, and your humble narrator will be heading on out that way Friday night to experience and compete in Saturday's festivities for the first time (both a first in attending the US Champs, and first time at ChillAxe).

If my practice last night was any indication, my time there as a competitor will be short lived - but you know that's not what I'm most excited about. Going to a new place, meeting people who I can bother with an interview and a series of nonsense questions - the road trip with my two dads - it's gonna be a delight.

If you've read this blog for any amount of time, you know I typically come up with a few goals for every event I todder on out to, and some of those goals are related to axe throwing, and some sure-as-shit are not. This is no different.

What is different, fer me at least, is that I'm not really thinking of them as goals. Rather, I'm imagineering some "do's" and "don'ts" for myself. Why, you ask? Who knows, I woke up this way.

My first US Champs will: have lots of fun on the way there, and the way back.

Traveling can stressful, even if I've lucked out by living in the same state as this particular event. How-ev-er, travel can also be a hoot, if you've got the right mindset and you've done a bit of pre-planning. What I'm trying to do, dear reader, is manifest the kind of trip I want to have.

One where me and my dads are listening to a comedy podcast or maybe some Heilung and have the perfect road snacks.

One where we see a sign for puppies and we pull over and make 3 new best friends that, somehow, aren't an issue when we bring them home.

Anyway - I'm excited about the trip with my very dear friends, and hopefully it won't turn out to be the three of us taking turns playing "smallest bladder."

My first U.S. Champs won't: try to give a damn about how I throw.

There are plenty of people who look at every tourney as a chance to push themselves to do the very best. And sometimes, I'm that people. But not this time.

Do I want to throw well? Surely. But I'm getting a certain feeling in my cute lil' bones that I'm not gonna do well - and there's a sort of freedom in that feeling. Can I explain why I feel like I'm not gonna do well? No. No I cannot. But rolling into the U.S. Champeensheep without the weight of expectation on myself is nice, and I wanna keep it going for the whole weekend.

My next U.S. Champs will: actually think before I interview someone.

The tiny axe thrower interviews. You love em, I love em. But I oftentimes panic just before, during, and just after interviewing people. I'm gonna do the novel thing this time around and, you know, think about the questions I wanna ask people before I stutter my way through an interaction.

My next U.S. Champs won't: buy another axe.

LISTEN: I just spent something like $2,800 bucks on a car inspection. I literally have about 100 dollars to my name. I. can. not. buy. anything. at this tourney. Don't even try to egg me into a matching tattoo. I won't do it! I will not! It's cheese sandwiches and water for me this weekend, thank you very much.

So, anyway, I hope to see you there. Look out for my lil' booklets scattered around and make sure to say hello if I'm too deep in my social anxiety. I promise: I'll be so glad you did.