Dear reader, we have options when it comes to what axe league to join. You've got WATL. You've got Major League Axe Throwing. You've got the IATF.
But even with all these choices, I feel like there isn't one that really caters to a very specific, very important group of throwers who, up to this point, have been under-represented.
Now, I'm not suggesting that we create a new axe throwing organizational body. No, no I think we have too many of those to begin with. What I'm suggesting is an organization within the organization. A symbiote, if you will, that helps...certain...people identify each other and help create spaces that cater to their particular needs.
That's why, after [a time] of research and development, I'm happy to unveil the:
SOCIETY of HIGHLY INTROVERTED THROWERS.
For too long, introverts have tried to navigate the loud, extroverted world of axe throwing and I, for one, have suffered. Being pushed into catch phrases and cheers, being noticed and smiled at when all I want is to be as invisible as possible. No longer!
The Society for Highly Introverted Throwers allows fellow introverts to find each other even during the most chaotic axe throwing events, and create spaces of peace. Spaces of ignoring each other. So we can be alone - together.
Joining is easy: are you an introvert (or have introverted tendencies) and throw axes? Congratulations - you're in the Society now.
Fellow members of this new axe throwing society can identify each other via our special wave:
Use your right hand to cover your nose (to simulate wearing a mask that covers your face/hides your identity, obvs)
With your left hand, make a sweeping motion with your fingers pointing up (ugh, too many people near me)
turn your left palm out to wave to the fellow Society member (but I'm happy to see you)
Society members can also, obviously, identify each other by wearing the Society of Highly Introverted Throwers badge. This badge also allows non-society members to quickly shut the hell up and stop trying to drag you into whatever loud, spotlight-focusing thing they're doing.
I invite all of you who have felt terrified while driving to a tourney, tried to hide yourselves while at a marathon league, or need 5 days to recover after a weekend axe-throwing event to consider joining the Society.
After all, you're already a member.
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